
gross. me. out.
Now, I'm not saying we need to go
THIS far, but do you think it possible to begin phasing out the tradition of blowing out birthday candles atop a cake? Please? It's kinda high on my all time gross-out list. Like, why is EVER ok for anyone to spittle all over anything you're going to eat. And cake? Why ruin a perfectly good slab of cake?? Seriously, if baked goods didn't have a sick, hypnotic hold on my neocortex & cerebellum, I would make certain to NOT participate in birthday cake. Unfortunately, I have absolutely zero control. Instead my face gets all cartoon-snake-eyed in front of baked goods and fear that I've consumed loads and loads of gross saliva.
Aaaaand, while I'm on a birthday rant...have you ever seen someone lick their fingers as they're serving cake to others? We (dev+me) used to work with a sweet lady who would swipe the frosting off of the knife after a few pieces and then she'd STICK THAT FINGER IN HER MOUTH AND BACK ON THE NEXT PIECE SHE SERVED. Ugh. To top it off, she was our office's self-declared cake cutter. I have no idea who let that happen, but definitely drew the line on that one. After a few months of watching silently and nearly vomiting on the conference table, I spoke up. To absolutely no avail, but at least I said something, right?
There was a document co-signed by me + Jamie last night that stated if and or when I have kids, they will be allowed to partake in birthday candle blow-out, but ONLY if they receive a separate cupcake or something to prevent overall cake contamination. As I'm typing this, I realize my plan and document can't put a dent in my own consumption of other kids' spit. Crap.
Maybe I'll just teach the kids to use birthday candles to light cigs instead.
FYI, this is our new coffee table book, courtesy of Smith + Chrismukah '08.
4 comments:
hahahaha i am dying. this was a hot topic of convo the other day. apparently my dad had an aunt grace (my grandpa's sister) who did the same thing, licking the frosting off her fingers and continuing to manhandle the poor cake. my nana made cake the other night and she started calling him grace b/c he was doing it :)
HIllarious!
cupcakes! everyone had their own individual cake... and it gives you a chance to use all those cupcake holders you wish to buy ;)
I'm with debi g. cupcakes allow you to only eat your own spit.
p.s. you're not allowed to teach children to smoke. ever.
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